People who suffer from low self-esteem and/or depression are often more prone to addictive behaviors (be it alcohol, drugs, or lust). We use the addiction to "self-sooth" feelings of inadequacy, and to escape from ourselves and from the harsh world around us.
Also, the "low self-esteem" is - in itself - a form of addiction as well. "It" wants us to believe we are un-likeable, incapable, and that no one really cares about us. This is a kind of self-defense mechanism that we often use as a sort-of shell to hide within. Instead of facing our real issues (which we find too hard to face), we use "low self-esteem" to say, "Heck, we aren't worth it anyway; no one cares anyway; we can't anyway". etc. etc... and we close up within ourselves.
So what are the "real issues" that we are trying to escape from?
Usually, this is all caused by a general "disconnect" from life - and from the Source of life (Hashem). Through the 12-Steps, millions of people around the world have learned how to reconnect to life and to G-d, and they have learned how live right - so that they aren't so uncomfortable inside that they feel a need to act out (in their addiction) or hide within a shell of self-pity.
The 12-Steps also take work, but it's a very different kind of work than what we are used to. Until now, we worked hard in FIGHTING the addiction, depression, and the low-self-esteem. With the 12-Steps however, the only type of work we have to do is; show up for the meetings, follow the instructions to a "T", and take the program seriously (as if our lives depend on it - because it often DOES). But the "other" type of work that we are used to ("white-knuckling" it) will slowly vanish as we progress in working the steps into our lives and become more connected to G-d and to feeling His love, and as we learn to "get out of the driver's seat" and let Him take over...
Most of here struggle greatly with depression.
We are depressed that we are depressed.
And we are depressed that we are in this cycle of depression.
Firstly, I would like to clarify a major misconception.
Many people think that we are depressed because we are sinning.
And that our neshama is depressed, therefore we are depressed.
This is not true.
I strive to serve Hashem as much as I can (for the most part),
And I still suffer greatly from depression.
Depression can come from several reasons:
1) Chemical imbalance - This happens. Some people are just biologically prone to be depressed.
2) Emotional discontent - Lack of feeling of security, and the occurrence of bad circumstances.
There are obviously more reasons, but these are two major ones that I think are the basic reasons for depression for people like us here on the forum.
We are not to blame for our depression!
We are not bad people!
We do not "deserve to be depressed"!
Depression is not something to fight.
It is something to heal.
If it is chemical imbalance, medicine helps greatly for this.
We can accept what Hashem gives us with love.
Sometimes He gives us happiness, and sometimes He makes us depressed.
Reb Tzadok says that this is a great Kapparas Avonos (see Battleworn's post below).
Because, as we all know, depression is like hell sometimes.
So thank You Hashem!
More often, depression comes from feelings of discontent inside us.
All of us here have this.
That's why we're here, isn't it?
This is something we are working on.
It takes time.
It will be healed.
Do not worry.
So when you are depressed, don't say to yourself:
"Oh man! Why can't I just be happy?!"
This is where Hashem put us right now.
Thank you Hashem for making me depressed today!
If You decided that I should be depressed, then I'm happy with it!
(Notice the irony in that statement?)
(Irony? Or the solution?)
Don't say:
"Oh man! My davening now will be weak anyway.
Any mitzva I do will be weak.
I might as well not do it."
Wrong!
Hashem wants us to give Him what we have.
If all we can do is learn for 10 minutes, then that is perfect!
Not ok. Perfect!
He put us here, depression and all.
Don't beat yourself up.
Give Him what you got.
It's all that He asks for.