Let us all remind ourselves what it was that pushed us to seek help. What was it about the addiction that we hated the most? If we focus on that, it will help us not to slip or fall.
For me it was as follows:
A. I was using it as a crutch for instant gratification
B. I knew that what I was doing was wrong
C. I was making excuses for my behavior
D. I was a hypocrite
E. I couldn't Daven
F. I felt guilty and ugly
H. I felt controlled (inhuman)
G. I convinced myself that if I only wanted, I could change my behavior in a second, which I know today is not true.
My friends, keep me strong. I really want to be a normal person. I can already feel the sweet taste of freedom.
I have not used my internet for 5 weeks other than for business related needs.
I need to keep my eyes in my head while driving (it's finally getting warm in the NY area).
And I need an extra boost of chizuk on guarding my eyes properly when I deal with women at work.
Next week is Parshas KEDOSHIM (Be Holy!). Let us all make new KABBALOS this week. Let's really give the Yetzer Hara a PUMMELING, HE REALLY DESERVES IT. We are all trying to serve Hashem and just be normal fathers, husbands, chavrusas, business people, etc...
The Sefarim write: KI BESIMCHA SEITZEI'U = Through Simcha, you will leave the clutches of the Yetzer Hara!
SO LET'S ALL REMAIN UP-BEAT AND NOT LOOK AT OURSELVES AS BEAT-UP STRUGGLERS, BUT RATHER AS VALIANT VICTORIOUS WARRIORS!!!!