As I came into my office this morning, my eyes fell upon an attractive woman waiting in the reception area. She was in my visual field for only a few seconds - but it was long enough for me to feel like a failure. After all my study, all my talk about Shmirat Einayim! I had fallen into the trap like an unsuspecting schoolboy.
I trudged into my office, beating up on myself as a hypocrite. A few minutes later, the phone rang. It was Dave. Is the guy psychic or something? I told him that I'm ready to give up - this challenge is simply too much for me.
He listened patiently as he always does. When I finished ranting, he said quietly, "What makes you think you're different from everybody else? We all fail once in a while. It doesn't make you a hypocrite, only human."
That was cold comfort. It didn't help me to know that others are overwhelmed too. But Dave wasn't finished. "Let me give you a little secret weapon," he offered. "Whenever you're confronted by a challenge like this, remember Yoseph HaTzaddik. He almost gave in to temptation too, but he overcame it. If you put in that extra ounce of effort, you will be putting yourself on his level - and the rewards are just as great."
"No way."
"I have it on good authority. Don't be discouraged. You may have trying moments, but don't let them get to you. When you work hard at this, your effort is rewarded in ways you can't even imagine."
So I felt better, determined to keep trying. One thing I know: When G-d promises blessings, He always delivers. Every now and then, I need that shot in the arm.
These e-mails are excerpts taken from the book "Windows of the Soul" by Rabbi Zvi Miller of the Salant Foundation.