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Men's Partner/Mentor Program

Always growing's Profile

Listing Options
He is looking For a Partner
  Contact Info   
Region North America
Contact preferences Chat
Correspondance Frequency Wants to be in touch once in a while
Languages English
  Personal Info  
Age 30
Marital status Married
Background Yeshivish
Children 1
Religious from birth Yes
Additional info I tried to stop many times and was unsuccesful staying stopped
Story I am married for 9 yrs. I love my wife. Had difficult start to marriage with extreme sexual trauma. We are working with our therapists for 7+ years with significant progress. We still have limited intimacy and have sex around 2 times in the last year. And before that was about 6 yrs of no sexual intercourse. I have what's called sexomnia and that severally hurt my wife. Sexual stimulation was not on the radar before I got married. I always fantasized about women. It was an escape for personal issues. When I got married the tiger was out of it's cage. I was needy for it and thought the more I put into it the more she'll feel loved and appreciated. At first not knowing better she went with it than she slowly closed up. Thinking it was the pregnancy. I was frustrated. And would grope her ad masturabate using her and more in my sleepyiness. Following the birth of our daughter things took a downturn. About 6 months later we started with a therapist and I slept in my own bedroom. Than I was constantly masturbating constantly. Boruch Hashem today I have different view on sexuality. And have been more open with my wife with my struggles. However lately after being petty clean for a long time. We are progressing slowly with our intimacy. But at the same time I started letting my sexual feelings come out of suppression. So I started dealing with innapropriate gazing at pictures online and than started to use for masturbating. I than crossed a line I never did and watched porn once or twice. I was at first devastated I crossed the red- line of porn. I have now come to accept it that's what happened and I can now work to avoid it in the future. I tried a few things, but I keep on feeling the urge to go back there. I am hoping now may be a time for me to join this program so I can do this in a responsible way.

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