Here's a great vort that I heard from a Rosh Yeshiva of mine on this week's parsha, Va'Yishlach. I think it can help us all in our attitude towards this challenge.
When Yaakov demands a bracha from the angel of Esav, the angel names him Yisrael "ki sarita im elokim v'im anashim va'tuchal - because you have striven with God and with men and have prevailed."
The question is, why wasn't his name changed to tuchal? Wasn't the victory of Yaakov that he succeeded?
The parsha is teaching us, that the focus is not the result, not the fact that Yaakov succeeded in his struggle. Rather, the focus must be the struggle itself.
Yaakov's bracha was based on the fact that he struggled, that he cared, that he really wanted to do something. The results were out his hands. The results were given to him as a gift by the Creator because he cared.
Now we can understand why this was manifest in a change in his name. His very identity, and the identity of his children forever, is based on the fact that he struggles to improve, and not the results.
And this is the true bracha to klal yisrael.