I read through the handbook last night for the 1st time and have found lots of great tools. Now I will start working through the handbook again more slowly, step by step. I am now seeing that there are blessings in this addiction, for example: the need to truly surrender to HaShem. By nature I'm a fighter, but that is all in my own strength. This is one battle that I now realize I cannot win on my own.
Thank you again. I can say that I am now looking forward with hope to be drawn closer to HaShem.