Preface:
A Way Out of Addiction for Orthodox Jews?
From Internet addiction to marital and family problems, from "teens at risk" to the psychological challenges facing those who are frum from birth and baalei teshuvah, today's changing world can be a confusing one. The religious Jewish community is also not immune to many sensitive contemporary issues, which can no longer be ignored. Yet sadly, some people who need psychological advice refrain from seeking it, believing that contemporary psychology and psychiatry are antagonistic to Yiddishkeit.
This important work by well-known therapist Dr. Naftali Fish offers a solid conceptual framework for understanding the relationship between Torah and psychology - including the Twelve Step program - showing clearly where they are compatible and where they are not. Dr. Fish is uniquely qualified to bridge this gap, as an Orthodox Jew grounded in Torah Judaism and the wisdom of our sages, and as a licensed clinical psychologist living in Jerusalem, with over twenty-five years' experience working with a variety of clinical issues, including the treatment of addictions and healing the inner wounded child. Here he presents the Nachas Ruach Treatment Model (NRTM), an innovative, effective approach that integrates Torah values and spirituality within the context of professional psychotherapy and hypnotherapy, as illustrated by intriguing case studies.
This book is a must-read for all professionals in the field of mental health, as well as for rabbis, educators, students studying psychology, and educated lay readers. Blending theory and practice, this book also provides practical tools and exercises for personal growth that anyone can gain from in their daily lives.
Concept 2: Part 6/6
2. Taste and see that God is good. Happy is the man who trusts in Him - Psalms 34:9
The Torah's Position on the Pleasure Principle or the Pursuit of Happiness
Chazal teach that in the last period before Messiah "there will be a great battle between the forces of holiness - kedushah - and the profane, before the latter is finally overcome."[1]
When viewed from a historical perspective, we could conclude that Sigmund Freud almost "got it" when he realized that the pleasure principle had been overly repressed in early twentieth-century culture and that this had negative consequences for mental health. He tried to legitimize the pleasure principle and allow it to be expressed more and repressed less. As a result, secular Western society, which was highly influenced by Freud's theories, encourages and models negative ways to express the pleasure principle, which are often destructive and can lead to the development of addictions. Contemporary society has in many ways gone to the opposite extreme of what Freud was reacting against. Freud had some basis to his claim that the superego or conscience of the "civilized man" of his time was too strict. However, today it is clear that the id or instinctual drives have gone out of control after being released. This consequence makes sense within the social context of a liberal society that advocates pleasure seeking and free expression and where there are few limits or boundaries set.
In contrast, the Torah view tries to integrate the experience of pleasure constructively within the framework of sanctity or "kedushah." Yet it still requires a committed Jew to work hard toward achieving this ideal within the framework of normative halachah. It is possible that the current situation is in some way ironically preparing the generation that has been given so many opportunities to experiment with different manifestations of the evil inclination to ultimately re-channel this energy back toward serving Hashem"with all your heart."
The Rabbis taught that "the purpose of the creation of this world is that the Holy One, blessed be He, desired to have an abode in the lower worlds."[2] The previous Rebbe of Slonim, z"l, wrote on the above teaching, "Hashem's desire is to have an abode,particularly in the lowest of the lowest world, and that the physical passions be utilized to fuel a holy fire (eish kodesh)."[3]
Here the Hebrew verb for "desire" (נתאוה) is shown to be related to the root for "passion." It might have been expected that Hashem would have "willed" to have a place in the lower world. By using the expression "desired," it seems to be implying that just as Hashem has a passionate desire to paradoxically be in this world, we should channel the passion from our "lower self" that He has created for us, to serve Him in a way that contributes to His Purpose being actualized.
Such an encompassing commitment, "With all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your might" (Deuteronomy 5:5) may have some aspects of being like a "positive addiction," a concept coined by Dr. William Glazer in his book on "reality therapy."[4]
From a Torah perspective, the strong desire to achieve closeness to Hashem, which is the root of observing all of the 248 positive mitzvos, and not feel distant from Him, which is the root of not doing any of the 365 prohibitions, is an important motivation that leads to studying Torah and doing mitzvos.[5] In the final chapter of Hilchos Teshuvah, the Rambam teaches the highest level is to serve Hashem from love. The Rambam asks, "What is the proper degree of love? That a person should love God with a very great exceeding love until his soul is bound up in the love of God. Thus he will be always be obsessed with this love, as if he is lovesick... This concept was implied by Shlomo HaMelech when he stated, as a metaphor: ' I am lovesick.' Indeed, the totality of the Song of Songs is a parable describing this love."[6]
For instance, a Jew who is used to putting on tefillin every morning and studying Torah every day will feel something "missing" or a sense of emptiness if for some reason he is not able to do so one day, such as when being in a state of anenus. The strong yearning to always be close to Hashem ultimately can and does enhance life, rather than degrade it, as is true with negative addictions.
ואתם הדבקים בה' חיים כולכם היום.
"But you who cling to Hashem, your God - you are all alive today."
(Deuteronomy 4:4)
[1] Likutei Halachos, Beheimah v'Chayah Tehorah 4:34.
[2] Midrash Tanchuma, Nasso 7:1.
[3] Netivos Shalom, Sefer Devarim, p. 208.
[4] William Glasser, MD, Positive Addiction (New York: Harper & Row, 1976), p. 93.
[5] Lessons in Tanya, ch. 4, pp. 77-78.
[6] Rambam, Hilchos Teshuvah 10:3.