This was written by a teenage girl who’s “been there done that” and wants to help YOU avoid getting caught up in this mess.
1) Ok, we know it's assur (the source is in the Igros Moshe, and many other places)
2) Most parents don't let, and if they find out they'll kill you and you'll lose all your privileges. It takes years to build up trust and only a second of doubt to lose it.
3) You risk getting caught by, and being thrown out of, your school.
4) You lose interest in your friends who will start to feel neglected and hate you.
5) You ruin you reputation. No one wants a bad reputation, and once your stuck with it, it's hard to get rid of it.
6) You WILL NOT stay shomer negiyah, which is even a bigger issur.
7) The guy is 100% talking bad about you to his friends, in one way or another.
8) All a guy wants at this age is play - and he’ll use you for that.
9) Every boy is a liar, a pervert, a jerk, and if you don’t know that yet you will eventually find this out.
10) A guy will say anything - just to get you into bed.
11) They occupy your whole mind - you'll be thinking about them 24/7.
12) You WILL regret anything you do with him, I promise.
13) If you have a reputation for talking to boys, your friends will get the same one, why would you want to do that to them?
14) At this age you think you want a guy like this or like that, etc.. When you get older, your priorities will change and you might have hard time by shidduchim.
15) Besides for the obvious aveiros, you do so many other aveiros because of this - you lie - you get mad, etc. etc.
16) Boys give you wayyyy too much confidence and you get self centered.
17) You trick yourself into thinking you love him, but really it's just artificial.
18) Imagine kissing your husband one day and thinking, 'The last time I was doing this it was with XYZ'.
19) You're always thinking about when he's gonna call, you can't think about anything else.
20) You start slacking off in school.
21) The later you stop, the worse off you are.
22) You think he is helping you, but he's only bringing you down.
23) You try to justify your talking to him, but you end up looking stupid.
24) They make you think it's cool - it's sooo not. Who respects you for talking to boys??
25) You start dressing to impress them and you think you look so hot and everything, but meanwhile you're like the skank of the town.
26) A guy will probably be oiver on zera livatala because of you, and that's like one of the worst averiros - and no doubt we get part of it.
27) You'll drag your friends to lower levels.
28) You’ll regret that he could have been such a great guy if not for you.
29) You're going to cause him to suffer a lot--why do you wanna do that to him? And later on when he regrets it, he'll hate you for it.
30) You will always be living with a guilty conscience.
31) You might set boundaries for yourself, but you're gonna slowly break them one by one.
32) You become desensitized to all the shmutz out there.
33) You lose a certain naivety that you'll never get back.
34) YOU CAN NEVER EVER TRUST A BOY.
35) You might start out talking to just one, but you'll end up talking to many--like his friends.
36) When you stop, you'll suffer so much, you'll feel like you're dead and you'll wish you'd never have known him!
37) You will probably end up at some point on bad terms, or hating each other.
38) You start talking, thinking and acting like a guy.
39) You can never just chill out, you always wanna be with him and think about him…
40) Think about how mean the guys are; if they call when we're doing something we stop and talk to them, but when we call, we're like the last on their list.
41) You can't be a complete girl around guys; they never understand.
42) You become dependant on them, when really they are the last thing you need.
43) Think about it - in 3 or 4 years you're gonna get married and be tied to someone forever. Enjoy the free time you have now - have fun with your friends – BE A GIRL.
44) Think about how much more fun you have when you're with friends all hyper and everything, than when you’re just sitting with him by a movie.
45) If you cared about him enough, you wouldn't do this to him.
46) If he cared about you enough, he wouldn't do this to you.
47) You lose purity that you can never get back.
48) Your girl friends help you grow and are there for you, but all a guy can do for you is make you feel sexy.
49) Whatever you do, your kids are going to do too, it always ends up like that. Would you want your kids doing what you're doing?
50) Boys have the biggest influence over you, and it can get risky.
51) You probably deserve a much more amazing guy than him.
52) Think about the schar you'll get for not talking to him.
53) Stop pretending you want it so much, how good can it be if there are so many people out there willing to do anything to stop you?
54) Do you want to have to compare the kiss of the one you truly love to the one who pretended to respect you just so he could get to french you?
55) If you do this till 12th grade, chances are you’ll never stop, and this can easily cause you to marry the wrong guy and have an awful marriage.
56) If he is really your bashert he will come back to you.
57) Girls are stupid. We know this. We know that guys use us and how gross they are but we ignore it until they do something to us, and then we get all hysterical. DON’T BE STUPID.
58) You might think it's ok to do what you do, but look at it from the eyes of a stranger--do you really think that's appropriate?
59) Look at all the girls who do and don't; compare and contrast.
60) After all you do for them, all they do is call you a zoooooyyyynah.
61) Even though you think he loves you and you love him, it's just your hormones, they're all wacked up.
62) They are not even ashamed of themselves for all they do.
63) They have no life, all they do is look at --uummm-pritzus all-day-long.
64) They know that we know all this and they still try to pretend they aren't like that.
65) Why do you think so many people wish they could change their past??
66) YOU ARE NOT MARRYING HIM.
67) Somehow no matter who does the dumping, the girl always ends up being hurt.
68) Remember, while you think it's fun and enjoyable to think about him and all the fun you shared, you just keep prolonging your obsession, which, no matter how fun it may be in the middle of your relationship, when you break up, it'll completely take over your mind and destroy you.
69) Hirhurim are also an aveirah (lo sassuru acharie levavchem ve’acharei eineichem)
70) When your zivug is made in shamayim 40 days before you are born, you fit together like 2 pieces of a puzzle. They click right into place. But in every immoral relationship you have (not for the sake of marriage) you break off pieces from the puzzle, so later on when you get to your zivug, the pieces won't fit exactly, they'll have a crack here and there or a dent. That’s pretty freaky, no????
71) Remember, a guy who kisses you all the time is not the one who cares about you. The one who stops is the real tzadik and the one who really cares for you (or himself).