The Library

From a therapist’s point of view, sex addiction is a dysfunctional preoccupation with sex that continues for a period of at least six months despite negative consequences and attempts to either quit or curtail the problem-causing behaviors. In other words, sex addicti...

Q: Do only people with “Addictive Personalities” have a problem with porn? A: So there is still a lot of debate on this one. A recent study by Simone Kühn, and Jürgen Gallinat, found that frequent porn users had a significant reduction in grey matter in areas of the bra...

Dear GYE, I am a frum married woman who has joined GYE a few weeks ago. I've been struggling to find a sponsor and direction as well as a 12 step group that would be the right fit for me. I have never wanted to go to a mixed SA meeting, but just yesterday, I have spoken...

Realize the effect masturbating has. This will be different for every person. For me, immediately I’m high, drunk, lost inside myself. Self-pleasure is mine, mine, mine. It leads me to sexualise every person that crosses my path. No longer are they human, they’re w...

I am fairly open about the fact that I am in recovery from sexual addiction, not only writing about it but talking about it in my other 12-step recovery programs when appropriate. (I have more than a decade of sobriety from both my chemical and sexual addictions.) As such...

Masturbation is a funny word. It might make you giggle thinking about the first time you got caught by your parents or caught your little brother in the act. It can be a great way to release tension, or a way to stay satisfied when you can’t be with a partner. For most of...

Being in a relationship with a sex addict does bring up the question of do I stay or leave? These questions are legitimate. In this exercise, I want to expose you to some options you may or may not have thought of before. 1. Stay and stay sick - This option is taken by ...

Question to the Rav: I struggle with lust for many years. I have been going out with a girl for a while now and I am deeply attracted to her personality. I enjoy our time together, our conversations of deep meaning. But I have little physical attraction to her. I am not s...

I read the article you sent me by this Rabbi criticizing the 12-step program. Rather than responding to each point, I would like to discuss a broader issue. Sexual addiction and pornography are now epidemic, even among frum people, and are destroying families. The followi...

Shame is an excruciating and agonizing emotion. When a person feels shame, he feels completely worthless and small, almost as if he has no right to exist. Shame is a powerful process that is hardwired into our system, and makes us humans sociable and responsive to the s...

The man in my office was beside himself. He had been seeing me for the past few weeks and made significant strides in recovering from his porn addiction. His path was not easy, but nevertheless rewarding – he had to face brutal realizations about himself and re-order hi...

People with the so called “porn addiction” suffer from a maladaptive relationship to sex in an obsessive & compulsive manner. “Porn addicts” have a number of criteria similar to those used to diagnose drug addiction, making them very similar in their appearance. Here ...

While a woman does not have the same physical stamp of the brit (circumcision) as a Jewish man, she must also carefully strive to live a life of sexual purity in accordance with the guidelines of our Sages. Just as with a man, she has an anatomical counterpart to the spir...

May 24th, 2012 By Janie Lacy, LMHC, NCC, CSAT Candidate, Sex Addiction Did you know that most individuals who have experienced sex addiction and have taken their recovery process very seriously and remain committed to it for life can be some of the healthiest indi...

Why Stop Lusting? Sexual lust is an inordinate thought or feeling that drives us to use ourselves, others, or things for self-centered destructive purposes. The spiritual sickness of lust wants sexual stimulation at that moment instead of what G-d is offering us. Later, w...

Fromwww.chabad.org by Tzvi Freeman Question: Is pornography bad? If so could you please explain why it's bad and how it affects a person's life? Answer: Good question. Too often we just assume something is bad because everyone says it's bad, without thinking into the re...

Q. I've tried quitting porn and masturbation before, but a funny thing happened - I got irritable and snappy toward my partner and surroundings. I then relapsed back into viewing porn and masturbation, because I didn't think becoming a nervous wreck was worth it. A. ...