Chapter 45- Prayer
Prayer helps us in the battle against desire in two ways. First, because our strength to fight the yetzer hara comes from Hashem, we must ask Him to grant it to us. Second, it helps us develop a relationship with Hashem. This does wonders in all areas of our religious observance, and is especially helpful in the battle against desire.
Hashem designed the world in a way that man must always depend on Him. This is for our good. Relying on Hashem cultivates a relationship with Him, which sparks the greatest spiritual growth (Rabbi Shafier, Shmuz 39: “I Need Needs” and Shmuz 63: “Prayer Part 1,” www.TheShmuz.com).
Further, having a relationship with Hashem is the most pleasurable experience possible. Hashem doesn’t just want us to experience this pleasure in the next world. He wants us to experience glimpses of a relationship with Him in this world too. Without a relationship with Him, life lacks meaning and is void of the greatest experience it has to offer. Hashem doesn’t want us to miss out on this even during the short time we are in this world. Also, the more we try to develop a relationship with Hashem in this world, the more we will feel we earned it when we come close to Him in the next world.
Hashem didn’t make us reliant on Him just for physical matters. He made us depend on Him for spiritual strength as well, as the Gemara (Sukkah 52b) tells us: “Rabbi Shimon Ben Lakish says, ‘A man’s yetzer hara gains strength over him every day and seeks to destroy him . . . and if not for Hashem Who is helping him, he could not defeat him. . . .’” By relying on Hashem in our lifelong battle against the yetzer hara, our accomplishments become much greater. We defeat the yetzer hara through a relationship with Hashem instead of without Him.
In addition, our achievements are magnified because anything we receive through prayer is credited to us. Thus, if Hashem limits the difficulty or gives us extra strength because of our prayers, we will be rewarded as if we overcame the original challenge without extra help. Further, relying on Hashem for spiritual strength brings meaning to our efforts. We are accomplishing “together with Hashem” so to speak. Feeling Hashem at our side as we conquer the yetzer hara is so sweet. It brings us so close to Hashem, even more than reliance upon Him for our physical needs does.
We must pray to Hashem constantly. We must ask Him for the strength to stand up to our desires, and for Him to weaken their intensity. We must request that He always put us in a mood conducive to feeling excitement about accomplishing, and we must pray that He doesn’t let us be caught off guard by desire. Most important, we must beg Hashem not to let us succumb no matter what. This is a vital part of our plan to attain self-control.
Obviously, for someone caught in the net of desire, the need to pray for Hashem’s help is much clearer, and prayer brings him phenomenal benefits. There is something special about crying out to Hashem, saying, “Hashem! I can’t do it myself! Please help me! Please help me escape the clutches of desire and once again control myself!” Amazingly, through reaching out to Hashem and relying on His help, we find the strength to regain control. Pleading to Hashem helps us psychologically — we realize that though we can’t do it alone, Hashem is helping us and we can succeed. And we benefit spiritually, through the extra help Hashem gives us.