I am a broken k'li. I used to be molei busha uch'limah (filled with shame and embarrassment) while acting out.
In recovery, I have come to see that I am a k'li sh'vurah (a broken vessel).
That's when all my busha and ch'lima leaked out.
Now I'm empty.
Only Hashem can fill me with his Light now.
And light does not leak out of a broken k'li.
And as long as I remember that I'm cracked, it'll stay empty of the busha and leave room for His Light.
B"H shelo asani oved!