I saw in the sefer Shomer Emunim that we can't even begin to fathom the Emunah (faith) that our forefathers had. The revelation that they had of Hashem is way beyond our grasp... BUT, Emunah P'shuta (simple faith) is our yerusha (inheritance) too, and we still have it and we will never lose it!
Emunah P'shuta means - I don't understand anything; everything is hidden before me, BUT... Hashem is in control. Period!!!
I don't need to see how Hashem is in control because.... I "know" it.
I don't need to feel that Hashem is in control because... I "know" it to be true.
Emunah P'shuta means "knowing" that Hashem is running EVERYTHING in spite of my lack of seeing it, feeling it, hearing it!!
No wisdom or philosophy is needed for this type of Emunah. It works even in the deepest depths of every kind of golus and even during the darkest times!
What "Me" just said... there really is nothing more to say. (In the 12-Step groups they talk about "Half-measures" and "full measures"). For me, this Yesod is the only "full measure".
This Shabbos, when the Y"H was trying to get me, I davened to Hashem and told him that he (the YH) is stronger then me and that I realized many times that I can't win over him, so He should please remove him from me so that I can stay pure. It was wonderful. Hashem listened to my prayers every time! And it wasn't even hard, cuz it wasn't ME struggling. I guess this is what it means to "let go and let g-d". I didn't come out all battered and bruised from battle, since I didn't fight. It was a wonderful feeling.
I had a moment of "LET GO AND LET G-D" clarity yesterday that I want to share. It's one of those moments when the whole blackness of the night gets lit up for a few seconds - as if by lightning.
Most times I feel that all the knowledge and understanding that I have regarding bitachon (reliance on G-d) and emunah (faith) is just that; knowledge - but without really "feeling" it in my heart. Can I "talk the talk"? Sure, like the biggest of Tzadikim! But when it comes time to actually "walking the walk".....
Well, yesterday I was feeling the weight of the whole entire world on my shoulders when all of a sudden I felt like lightning flashed before me and I hit my forehead with my hand and said to myself: "Wait a minute here Nurah - you little shnook! Your body, with all its zillions of details is working just fine all these years - may the Almighty continue to watch over all of us - and that is without too much input from you. So why do you think that the Almighty needs your help now to BALANCE THE CHECKBOOK?!!"
Yes, He Who gives life - gives Sustenance!
Along the lines of what "Nura" just wrote, I once heard a beautiful vort. The Pasuk says: "Asapra el chok, Hashem amar elai, b'ni ata, ani hayom yeliditicha". We can translate the Pasuk as follows: "Asapra el chok - when I talk about Parnasa" (chok is a lashon of parnasa) and I wonder what will be, "Hashem amar elai - Hashem says to me","B'ni ata - you are my son", "ani hayom yeliditicha? - did I just give birth to you today??"
In other words, "how did you manage until today? Well, in the very same way I will care for you now as well!"
Thursday morning I went with an 'adopted' daughter who was in labor, figuring I'd be home by afternoon. Trust me, I never figured I'd be there 3 days straight!!
Anyway, BH all is fine now; Am Yisrael was zoche to another little boy.
This concept of "Letting Go and Letting G-d" is still a new concept to me, at least in the realm of addiction - but oh; what a freeing one! I spent the last 3 days sharing this yesod. There is nothing like a "birthing experience" to really send home the message that Hashem is VERY CLEARLY running the show, second by second!