I am concerned that I may let my guard down after making it past 30 days .
Hi Think Good,
I have been told at SA meetings, that if I have one eye on yesterday and one eye on tomorrow, then I am cross eyed on today. Yesterday is history and tomorrow is a mystery, all we have is the here and the now. And right here and right now, I want to stay clean and sober.
One of the oldest tricks of the Yetzer Hara is to make a person give up before he has even started by making him ill with worry; "how will I manage to stay sober so long, I am so worried I may act out". And guess what happens? We throw in the towel and act out, and the YH has won.
So when I wake up in the morning, the first thing I say is "thank you Hashem for keeping me sober last night" and then I say "please Hashem keep me sober today", and I commit to staying sober JUST for today, no matter what.
So my friend, stop worrying about staying sober after 30 days. Moshiach may come then, and then we will all be cured. All you have is the present. Focus on the present. Do what ever it takes to stay sober now, and leave the future to Hashem to worry about. I am sure you have enough worries without worrying about the future.
Hatzlocho
London