Today I went to buy flowers for Shabbat - a sweet, simple mitzvah, right? But I was thrown for a loop when the pretty clerk told me that the flowers I chose need special treatment. She started giving me detailed instructions. I was unprepared for this and struggled to listen without staring at her. I focused my eyes on the flowers.
A few weeks ago, I would have considered this experience discouraging because I had to struggle so hard to avert my attention from her. But I guess all of that Mussar study is finally kicking in. I gained control of the situation, remembering that the effort itself draws me closer to Hashem.
When it comes to Shmirat Einayim, I know that I've grown and improved. I don't want recognition for it from anyone. It's between G-d and I. Only we know how hard this is for me and how far I've come.
These e-mails are excerpts taken from the book "Windows of the Soul" by Rabbi Zvi Miller of the Salant Foundation.