I decided to buy a little gift for Dave because I really appreciate the time he spends learning Mussar with me. I went to the Hebrew bookstore and bought him a gift certificate. When I gave it to him, though, his reaction was puzzled.
"Thanks, so much, Steve," he finally said, "but I don't understand why you did this."
"I just want to thank you for all the time we spend learning together."
"But I'm learning this for myself as much as for you," he protested. "It's doing just as much good for me as for you."
I had thought he was just being nice, helping me win my particular battle. It never occurred to me that there was something in it for him.
"Since we started learning about Shmirat Einayim together, I'm much less apt to slip up," he explained. "And somehow, by explaining it to you, I clarify these issues for myself too. You should try it. Who do you know who could benefit from learning about this?"
Now it was my turn to object. "Hey, I'm no master! Who am I to teach Shmirat Einayim to anybody? I'm not that good at it myself!"
"You don't have to be perfect. Share something good with someone else. You'll see; it will give you more strength."
I thought of my friend Sam, a guy I know at work. He's got the same challenges in the office that I do. I know him to be a sincere Jew; more than once he's mentioned that he wishes he had more time for Torah study. Maybe he'd like to take in a little Mussar on our lunch-break.
These e-mails are excerpts taken from the book "Windows of the Soul" by Rabbi Zvi Miller of the Salant Foundation.